The Rime of the Ancient Motorcyclist

[Ned]

Am I doomed to ride the roads forever, ill-fated by my unfortunate encounter with a large seabird yesterday afternoon?
Unlike the ancient mariner I didn't deliberately shoot the juvenile black backed gull, I merely headbutted it at around 30Kph. Heading for home from work the long way round as we tend to do on those crisp but clear winter's days, I took a route around the coast which is both curvaceous and scenic. About 20Km from home I rounded a bend in one of the bays to enounter two of the aforementioned gulls squabbling over some dead creature,s innards (most likely a road kill possum) in the middle of the road. One saw me and flapped quickly to safety. The other thinking it had won the battle of the guts flapped lazily with the entrails dangling right into my path reaching head height just as I reached it. With nowhere to go but straight ahead on a narrow winding road, it was throw out the anchor and pray. I took it smack on the top of my helmet with the feast of guts entangling in my mirror and over my shoulder. The bird bounced off and got caught in the whole messy guts got dragged behind my bike while I continued to slow down. A black backed gull, apart from being a protected species, although far from rare, is about the size of a large long winged chicken. I pulled over, parked and walked back to where the unfortunate creature had already flapped its last flap and died because I think it may have broken its neck and gone under my back wheel. I doubt that gulls are particularly tasty so I kicked into the ditch and with a smear of the malodorus gunge from its proposed dinner across my skid lid and jacket, I headed for home. The jacket cleaned up alright and the helmet is fine but I've got a bit of whiplash stiff neck today.
Life is full of little surprises!

[Harvy]

Am I doomed to ride the roads forever, ill-fated by my unfortunate encounter with a large seabird yesterday afternoon?
Unlike the ancient mariner I didn't deliberately shoot the juvenile black backed gull, I merely headbutted it at around 30Kph. Heading for home from work the long way round as we tend to do on those crisp but clear winter's days, I took a route around the coast which is both curvaceous and scenic. About 20Km from home I rounded a bend in one of the bays to enounter two of the aforementioned gulls squabbling over some dead creature,s innards (most likely a road kill possum) in the middle of the road. One saw me and flapped quickly to safety. The other thinking it had won the battle of the guts flapped lazily with the entrails dangling right into my path reaching head height just as I reached it. With nowhere to go but straight ahead on a narrow winding road, it was throw out the anchor and pray. I took it smack on the top of my helmet with the feast of guts entangling in my mirror and over my shoulder. The bird bounced off and got caught in the whole messy guts got dragged behind my bike while I continued to slow down. A black backed gull, apart from being a protected species, although far from rare, is about the size of a large long winged chicken. I pulled over, parked and walked back to where the unfortunate creature had already flapped its last flap and died because I think it may have broken its neck and gone under my back wheel. I doubt that gulls are particularly tasty so I kicked into the ditch and with a smear of the malodorus gunge from its proposed dinner across my skid lid and jacket, I headed for home. The jacket cleaned up alright and the helmet is fine but I've got a bit of whiplash stiff neck today.
Life is full of little surprises!

Ned, just thank your lucky stars you don't have Emu over there mate.

Harvy

[markmartin]

Bumble Bees, June Bugs, and now Sea Gulls.-- Another good reason to wear a helmet! Hope your neck is feeling better soon Ned.

[weymouth399]

Bumble Bees, June Bugs, and now Sea Gulls.-- Another good reason to wear a helmet! Hope your neck is feeling better soon Ned.

My buddy was on his concourse taking his 11 year old daughter for a ride, when a FISH came from the sky.
He couldn't belive it so he turned around and sure as shit it was a 8in fish, it must have been dropped by a   dump duck (seagull).
He's to cool to wear a helmet, but sun screen he should put on.  CBHF (Nascar refrence)

Bob W

[Travis398]

I've got a bit of whiplash stiff neck today.

ohhh no! The curse of the albatross has begun.

[Mark Olson]

never hit a bird on the fj before , that must have been spooky.

[1tinindian]

Several years ago, while riding my GS1100 Suzuki with my son on the back, three of Iowas state bird, the gold finch, flew up in front of me.
The first two timed it right, but that poor little 3rd one just didn't have enough speed and I hit it with my left shoulder, killing it, nothing but a "poof" of bright yellow feathers, and it was all over!

Leon

[The General]

Several years ago, while riding my GS1100 Suzuki with my son on the back, three of Iowas state bird, the gold finch, flew up in front of me.
The first two timed it right, but that poor little 3rd one just didn't have enough speed and I hit it with my left shoulder, killing it, nothing but a "poof" of bright yellow feathers, and it was all over!

Leon

At that speed, How did ya know he was male?

[Lotsokids]

ohhh no! The curse of the albatross has begun.

That dude needs a breath mint!

That's quite a story. No doubt you (and most of us here) would have given nearly anything to get a video of that.

[Ned]

Yes, we are lucky that moas are extinct, they couldn't fly anyway but a the giant ones were about 3m tall and built like Kenworth trucks. That is my second traffic related encounter with black backed gulls in recent years. The last one involved driving past a takeaway bar (KFC) where the gulls regularly empty the rubbish bins across the road and my car and several others got showered with cold french fries and chicken bones as an adult bird got airborne with a payload of wrappings from the bin. They are referred to as the rats of the sky and weigh up to 1.5Kg with a wingspan of 1.5m. Luckily, this time, I had taken the instinctive precaution of ducking so the bastard only bounced off the top of my helmet not hit full on or I may not have been so lucky. The neck has already recovered and the stink of possum guts no longer lingers about my jacket.
The curse may involve pushing my bike with an empty tank, lost in the midlle of nowhere, in endless circles if it is to emulate the curse of the albatross.
Must remember to fill up the tank on the way home today...

Ned

[fj11.5]

List of things with a wish for a short fj ride, , owl, rabbits, gulls,wallabies, possums, usually attack from the side with little or no warning, , a bee throat hit, wasp temple hit while adjusting glasses with visor up,  crow left fork leg trying to avoid a murder of them hiding in the shadows , causes a nice wobble at 70ks , ,ducking and swerving to avoid hitting a small bird but it took its own life on my left shoulder,leaving a nice trail of white crap down my back and feathers everywhere, all within 22 years of riding, could be a few that have been forgotten for good reason , no amount of rider training will help avoid a creature that wants to share the ride

[markfj]

, no amount of rider training will help avoid a creature that wants to share the ride

Yup, we got a ton of deer and turkey up here.  Both of which I've bagged in a 4 wheeled vehicle.  There deer have gotten so bad that I've really cut down on riding at night and I'm uber cautious if I do.  Hope your neck feels better and I'm glad it wasn't anything bigger!!

[grannyknot]

I took a Robin in the chest 30 years ago, I was only doing about 40mph but my God it felt like I had been hit by a shot gun. I don't know how I kept the bike upright but did, pulled over and was sure I was going to find blood under my jacket. It didn't break the skin but turned into a lovely bruise. Got lots of sympathy and attention from the girls, well worth it. I say, "aim for the little buggers" .

[andyoutandabout]

Just to chip in - I once hit a bat riding home at night round the english countryside. Hit my left glove and tangled itself round the clutch lever, the wings flapping on my fingers. No damage to me for bike (a GS550) but the bat was a gonna.

[fj11.5]

Thats a new one, never heard of a bat having a death wish