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General Category => Maintenance => Topic started by: Anti-Dive Dave on November 28, 2012, 05:55:08 PM

Title: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: Anti-Dive Dave on November 28, 2012, 05:55:08 PM
So....erm...........I had this question......  :bomb:

:dash2: :dash2: :dash2: :dash1:

:mad: :ireful:

:rofl:



*Disclaimer:

* The user accepts no responsibility for anyone busting a vein by being confronted with this topic......again.  I do not expect an answer, as it is not to be taken seriously.  I DO use oil in my bike.  Blackish-brownish-golden-liquidy stuff.  Comes out of a bottle.  Recommended for 4 stroke engines.  10-40w.  Good enough for me.  Synthetic?  Fully synthetic?  Tractor oil?  I dunno.  It's oil, and it lubes me engine.  What brand?  Haven't a clue - it's made on behalf of the local discount warehouse.  Again...it's OIL, simple as.  And remember...shares can go up as well as down.....no money back guarantee....can stain certain items and should not be used unless under supervision.  Athough no animals were harmed, we regret to inform that a few electrons died during the typing of this shite...terms and conditions apply...see label on underpants for more details...
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: ribbert on November 28, 2012, 06:00:31 PM
Quote from: Anti-Dive Dave on November 28, 2012, 05:55:08 PM
So....erm...........I had this question......  : :dash2: :dash2: :dash2: :dash1:


We can perhaps settle two questions at once here, a 3XW running blue dot infused, double overhead molecule synthetic oil is the fastest bike.

Noel
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: Anti-Dive Dave on November 28, 2012, 06:46:29 PM
Quote from: ribbert on November 28, 2012, 06:00:31 PM
A 3XW running blue dot infused, double overhead molecule synthetic oil is the fastest bike

At what point do you awake from this wonderful dream?

:bomb:   :rofl:

I mean, MY old 1TX with own brand cheapo oil and bugger all else worthwhile added can STILL whip an FZR1000 RU at the lights....

Granted, he catches up within the next 75 yards, and vanishes ahead in a screaming rage filled battering of rubber tyre shavings...but up until then, I feel like a God!
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: FJSpringy on November 28, 2012, 06:49:39 PM
Quote from: Anti-Dive Dave on November 28, 2012, 05:55:08 PM

*Disclaimer:

* ...see label on underpants for more details...

this makes the assumption that FJ owners wear them  :lol:
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: SlowOldGuy on November 28, 2012, 08:11:14 PM
I think you should use WD-40. 

It works in the forks and on the chain also

DavidR.
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: Alf on November 29, 2012, 02:18:06 AM
In Mediterranean countries like Spain the olive oil works better and its cheaper. And when changing the oil you can dipping bread in
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: flips on November 29, 2012, 04:10:26 AM
You could use fish oil.It has omega 3's.Whatever oil you choose check your oil level regularly...
(http://www.bestmotivationalposters.com/images/oil-funny-motivational-poster.jpg)
or you could use...
(http://s153139690.websitehome.co.uk/oil2.jpg)
Cheers :drinks:

Jeff P
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: Anti-Dive Dave on November 29, 2012, 07:03:45 AM
Quote from: flips on November 29, 2012, 04:10:26 AM
(http://s153139690.websitehome.co.uk/oil2.jpg)

Now, I LIKE this idea of the sex oil and reckon it would provide many smiles per gallon of pure riding pleasure.

I have a few problems with it though...

a)  I would have to find a really "active" lady who is "excitable" at a moments notice.

b)  Once lady is "excitable", how on earth do I keep her still, as I try to balance her over my oil filler cap?

c)  It could take a while.....

d)  With her wriggling all over the place, she'd spill more than I could fill.

e)  How do I explain the serious clutch slip then next time I'm at the garage?

Suitably intrigued now...

I'm away to try and word an advert in the "Wanted" section of me local newspaper....
Title: Re: What type of oil should I use?
Post by: fj11.5 on November 29, 2012, 06:10:46 PM
You silly man, wouldn't it be easier to find a double jointed ,nympho,acrobatic chick ,who could just top the oil up on her own  :biggrin: