Harley Rider

[TexasDave]

            A Harley rider is riding by the zoo in  Washington, DC when he  sees a
>> little girl leaning into the lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion  grabs her
>> by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull  her inside  to slaughter
>> her, under the eyes of her screaming  parents.
>>
>> The biker jumps off his Harley,  runs to the cage and hits the lion
>> square on the nose with a  powerful punch.
>>
>> Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back
>>  letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified
>> parents, who thank him endlessly. A reporter has watched the whole
>> event.
>>
>> The reporter addressing the Harley rider says, 'Sir,  this was the most
>> gallant and brave thing I've seen a man do in my  whole life.'
>>
>> The Harley rider replies, 'Why, it was nothing,  really, the lion was
>> behind bars. I just saw this little kid in  danger and acted as I felt
>> right.'
>>
>> The reporter says, 'Well,  I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a
>> journalist, you know,  and
>> tomorrow's paper will have this story on the front page... So,  what do
>> you do for a living and what political affiliation do you  have?'
>>
>> The biker replies,
>>             ~I'm  a U.S. Marine and a Republican ~
>>
>> The  journalist leaves.
>>
>> The following morning the biker buys the  paper
>>  to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on  the front
>> page:
>>
>>
>> "U.S.  MARINE ASSAULTS   AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS  LUNCH"
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> ...and  THAT
>>             pretty much sums up the media's approach to the news  these
>> days...
>>
>>How true.   Dave
>>
>>
>

[fj1289]

 

[Nova]

A little old lady wanted to join a biker club. She knocked on the door of a local biker club and a big, hairy, bearded biker with tattoos all over his arms answered the door. She proclaimed, "I want to join your biker club." The guy was amused and told her that she needed to meet certain biker requirements before she was allowed to join. So the biker asked her, "You have a bike?" The little old lady said, "Yea, that's my Harley over there," and points to a Harley parked in the driveway. The biker asked her, "Do you smoke?" The little old lady said "Yea, I smoke. I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day and a couple of cigars while I'm shooting pool." The biker is impressed and asked, "Well, have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz?" The little old lady said, "No, I've never been picked up by the fuzz, but I've been swung around by my nipples a few times."

[Charlie-brm]

Oh sh!T Nova, that honestly had me laughing out loud, not just an internet LMAO.