A man enters a bar with his pet monkey, proceed to down a beer while the barkeep observes his pet monkey raid a jar of olives and eat a few. Monkey proceeds down the the bar-top stops and eats out of a bowl of pretzels. Mildly perturbed, the barkeep was just ready to complain to the monkeys owner when the monkey jumped onto a billiard table and ate the cue ball!
Upset at his missing cue-ball the barkeep expressed his agitation to the monkey's owner. Fearing a ban from his favourite drinking-establishment, the monkey's owner offered his apologises, left a hugh tip and headed for the door with his Monkey in tow.
The following week, much to the barkeeps dismay the same man with monkey in-tow entered again, and once again he watched as the monkey worked his way down the bar. Having quite enough he confronted the owner and exclaimed that not only had his monkey helped himself to all the snacks, but was sticking each one up his butt before consuming them!
The monkey's owner explained that ever since that poor monkey passed the cue ball from his last visit, he carefully measures everything to ensure it will fit before he eats it! :crazy: