I hope you English get this joke because it's the best English joke I have.
This guy brakes down and his auto's barely running when he rolls into a garage. He talks to the mechanic. The mechanic tells him to "come back in 3 hours and I'll see what I can do". 3 hours later the guy walks in the garage and peeks into the bays. He sees his car and theres a pair of leg under the car, he thinks to himself "not done yet" and leaves. Comes back an hour later and peeks in again. The legs are still under the car and he leaves. Come back and peeks in, theres the leg still under the car. He walks over and grabs one of the legs and pull it out, it's a wooden leg. Humm...he says "Just as I though!"
Joe, help me out here...I've re-read it 3 times..slowly.
Is the key in the last word? Though? or Thought?
Quote from: Pat Conlon on February 21, 2014, 09:13:56 PM
Joe, help me out here...
I'm with you Pat... but I'm Irish and figured it was over my head.
Frank
All I can figure out is there is a "leg" and then there are legs ??
George
Quote from: Flynt on February 21, 2014, 09:17:36 PM
Quote from: Pat Conlon on February 21, 2014, 09:13:56 PM
Joe, help me out here...
I'm with you Pat... but I'm Irish and figured it was over my head.
Frank
Quote from: Pat Conlon on February 21, 2014, 09:13:56 PM
Joe, help me out here...I've re-read it 3 times..slowly.
Is the key in the last word? Though? or Thought?
Quote from: Joe Sull on February 21, 2014, 07:00:11 PM
I hope you English get this joke because it's the best English joke I have.
This guy brakes down and his auto's barely running ........
??
Noel
Hench the leg.... :morning1:
George
...And then the duck says, "A FORKLIFT??? ...and you didn't invite ME???!!!" :lol: :lol: :lol:
Cap'n Ron. . .
Thanks Noel....that's gotta be it....barely running, wooden legs," I thought so...."
Now I can sleep..
An English guy. What! Told me that joke and I laughed, cause just the thought of wooden legs under the car was funny and that It took him 5 hours to discover it, is funny. And then he pretends he new it all along!
Come in guys- This is funny stuff! :lol:
I was told that English humor is dry....
I got one more
An American goes over to England to visit a friend and the friend takes him to a local pub. There's quite a crowd there and it's very loud.
One chap yells out "63" and the whole crowd brakes out laughing. Another yells "55" and the laughing kept going louder.
The American says to his friend "I'm gonna try it" He stands up and yells "88" and the laughter stops, some people grumbling.
The American turns to his friend "what happened"
The English guy says "It's not the joke, it's how you tell it" :sarcastic:
My friend Roddy was quite a character. He joined the service in England when he was young and was a paratrooper in the RAF. When he got out he came to America and got his citizenship and joined the Army and became a paratrooper. When he got out, He went to diving school. I met him down in Boston on the "Big Dig".
or
Maybe I just can't tell a joke like he can :bad:
:scratch_one-s_head: OK, but how does the paratrooper and the "Big Dig" fit in.
The paratrooper has legs and jumped in the hole? :unknown:
Quote from: FeralRdr on February 22, 2014, 09:26:56 AM
:scratch_one-s_head: OK, but how does the paratrooper and the "Big Dig" fit in.
It was a BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG DIG
Quote from: Joe Sull on February 22, 2014, 05:39:44 AM
And then he pretends he new it all along!
Come in guys- This is funny stuff! :lol:
I was told that English humor is dry....
I got one more
An American goes over to England to visit a friend and the friend takes him to a local pub. There's quite a crowd there and it's very loud.
One chap yells out "63" and the whole crowd brakes out laughing. Another yells "55" and the laughing kept going louder.
The American says to his friend "I'm gonna try it" He stands up and yells "88" and the laughter stops, some people grumbling.
The American turns to his friend "what happened"
The English guy says "It's not the joke, it's how you tell it" :sarcastic:
My friend Roddy was quite a character. He joined the service in England when he was young and was a paratrooper in the RAF. When he got out he came to America and got his citizenship and joined the Army and became a paratrooper. When he got out, He went to diving school. I met him down in Boston on the "Big Dig".
or
Maybe I just can't tell a joke like he can :bad:
:good2: Onya Joe, you`re a brave man....I`m enjoying it more as you progress!....keep`m coming.
When you were told English humour was dry....ummmm, were you at the Pub?
We got a number animals of the same species at our local zoo, but can you believe they only have one of my favourite animals (dogs)....it`s a shih tzu!
...I too am a sic puppy! :sorry: :scratch_one-s_head:
Come on.... WHERE'S ONE OF THE eNGLISH GUYS, I NEED ONE TO BACK ME UP HERE! :shout:
Quote from: Joe Sull on February 22, 2014, 05:44:12 PM
Come on.... WHERE'S ONE OF THE eNGLISH GUYS, I NEED ONE TO BACK ME UP HERE! :shout:
Oh! Oh! Hold on! I know this one!
"Biiiiiiiiiiiiig Dig" Gotta remember that; Thanks Noel. :blush: but I digress......
Their all in the pub having a pint. :good:
:morning1: It must have been on a Sunday, and it must have been in Wales, because a few years back in Wales there was what was known as dry counties where alcohol was banned on the Lords day. :diablo:
Anyway, this horse walks into a pub, in England I must stress, and asks the bartender for a pint of bitter. "Sure", says the bartender, "but what's with the long face"? :wacko3:
Quote from: FJ111200 on February 23, 2014, 02:16:26 AM
Anyway, this horse walks into a pub, in England I must stress, and asks the bartender for a pint of bitter. "Sure", says the bartender, "but what's with the long face"? :wacko3:
:rofl: :lol: :mail1: nEED i SAY more! :bye2:
Quote from: FeralRdr on February 22, 2014, 08:16:20 PM
Quote from: Joe Sull on February 22, 2014, 05:44:12 PM
Come on.... WHERE'S ONE OF THE eNGLISH GUYS, I NEED ONE TO BACK ME UP HERE! :shout:
Oh! Oh! Hold on! I know this one!
"Biiiiiiiiiiiiig Dig" Gotta remember that; Thanks Noel. :blush: but I digress......
Their all in the pub having a pint. :good:
Yes, well, FeralRdr missed the joke at the joke which only confirms my belief that humour is a risky business on a global forum. Subtle regional differences make side splitters in some parts of the world head scratchers in others.
Unless the humour is 2"x 4" in the face obvious it won't have universal appeal, let alone be understood. And, delivery has a lot to do with it. A good joke teller will have them lying in the aisles before he/she even gets to the funny part.
Australia was raised (still is) on American television, is over run with Poms and we have, like most other places, our own unique humour except no one else gets that because we are not exported to the world. We are exposed to it all.
Australian movies released in the States for example often have the script modified because they don't get the humour. To us, they have just taken the best bits out.
That said, there are still a lot of very funny jokes passed on here. BTW, I like the "long face" one. I like those quick one liners.
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7376/12716176524_a3fae1a275_o.jpg)
Noel